2006 Archive:...January..February..March..April..May..June..July..August..September..October.November..December

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GrandsPlace News
January 2006

 

Dealing With Temper Tantrums

Everyone has temper tantrums once in a while. I have been known to have a few well -planned tantrums of my own when I need to get my point across. But with our children tantrums are a way of coping with the uncertainties of their early lives. We tend to feel sad that the children came to us from unreliable and unstable bio parents. We tend to want to undo the early hurts and make up to the child for past pain we did not cause. That tends to make us second-guess our natural instincts when dealing with behavior issues like temper tantrums. By all means we must get the children psychological help when needed, but in the meantime we must treat unacceptable behavior issues with consistency and firmness. Here are 5 strategies for dealing with tantrums.

1. Never give in!
When you get to the point where you feel like giving in stop. Giving a person what he or she wants in response to a tantrum teaches him or her that tantrums work. It’s like rewarding bad behavior. No matter how disturbing the tantrum is to everyone involved, don’t do it.

2. Head a tantrum off at the source! Learn to recognize the things that set off tantrums and avoid them. Children are more prone to tantrums when they are sick, tired, wound up, and bored.  Plan trips to the store when your child is fed rested and content.

3. Explain before you get to the store what you are willing to give and what will happen if he or she asks for more. Some days when I am feeling like Danni needs a little reward we go to the store and I say, “You may get one toy that is $10 or less.”. Other times when I am short on cash I say. “We are going to the store to get milk. I have no money for anything else. If you ask I will not only say no but you will lose desert tonight.”

4. Do not respond to tantrums. Say nothing until the child has calmed down. Trying to talk to an out of control person is fruitless. After the child has calmed down is the time to talk about what happened and what could have been done differently.

5. Have a “Tantrum Safe Place”.  Set up a place in where a child can kick scream and otherwise go wild but not hurt himself or others.  Remove all objects that can become missiles.  If and when a tantrum erupts promptly pick up the child, deposit him in the safe area without speaking to him and stand guard at the door to prevent escape.

Recipie Of The Month

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Household Hints - After The Party Clean Up

REMOVE WAX FROM CARPETING
Place a paper towel over the stain and draw the wax up into it by placing a warm iron over the paper towel (this is called "capillary action"); repeat if necessary. Sponge the stained area with 1 c. isopropyl alcohol and 2-3 c. water if the stain remains. Sponge from the outside to the inside of the stain. Be very sure not to get the area too wet or you can bring up a stain from the padding.

REMOVE CANDLE WAX FROM FURNITURE
Turn stained furniture upside down. Put a piece of cotton cloth (T-shirt) over the wax stain. Using a hot chrome or metal finish curling iron, heat wax and let it melt into the cloth. This may take several applications to fully remove the wax.

REMOVE CANDLE WAX ON MATERIAL
Remove the excess the best you can. This is best done by putting an ice cube on the wax to harden it, then peeling or scraping off the excess wax. Then place an absorbent piece of paper underneath, such as a brown paper bag. Put a white paper towel on top. Place a warm (not hot) iron on top over the paper towel and it should draw the wax up to the towel.

REMOVE CANDLE WAX FROM CANDLE HOLDERS
Put candle holders in the freezer til wax is frozen. Chip the wax off. Or, put holders under very hot water and wipe wax off.

TO REMOVE ODOR FROM PLASTIC CONTAINERS
Put tomato juice on a sponge and wipe it around. Also can be used to remove odors form inside of refrigerators and dogs. Wash containers and lids with soap and water, dry well and put lid and bowl separately into freezer for a couple of days.

REMOVING RED WINE STAIN
Saturate a cloth or sponge with hydrogen peroxide and blot the stain. If the stain is in carpet do not saturate the actual carpet just use a cloth or sponge that has hydrogen peroxide applied to it.

REMOVE WATER OR HEAT MARKS ON WOOD SURFACES (You Know, Those White Marks)
1.) Polish with pure lemon oil. Find a brand called o'cedar, we were told it's the best brand.
2.) Use Wright's silver polish, diluted slightly; apply gently, let stand and wipe dry.
3.) Use spirits of camphor.
4.) Mix cigar and or cigarette ashes with a couple of drops of water and make a paste. Rub lightly on the mark to remove.
5.) Try a paste of baking soda and water and use as above in number 4.
6.) Try as above using toothpaste.
7.) Again as above using mayonnaise.

ELIMINATE DISCOLORATION AND COVER SCRATCHES IN WOOD FURNITURE
Break a piece of peanut, walnut or pecan and rub the broken side over scratches in wooden furniture. The oil from the nutmeat can eliminate discoloration and the furniture may look almost as good as new.

REMOVE CRAYON STAINS
To remove crayon stains from glass, porcelain, Formica, metal, plastic, no-wax vinyl floors, painted walls, painted wood, scrubbable wallpaper, tile, chalkboard and marble. Spray surface to be cleaned with WD-40 and wipe with a soft cloth. If a residue remains add liquid dish washing detergent into water, wash the surface with a sponge, working in a circular motion and rinse. Repeat as needed.

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I am Sorry Folks Due to my health I was unable to send this newsletter for several months. Please accept my sincere apologies. I am on  the mend now and expect to do the job much better in the coming year.
Kathy

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The GrandsPlace Chat Room

Want to talk real time with other grandparents and special others that are living the same life you are? Please join us at Chat. The GrandsPlace chat room is open to all every night from 9 pm eastern to 11 am eastern. (thats 8 pm central, 7 pm mountian, and 6 pm pacific time zones. To chat click the link below
http://grandsplace.org/gp2/chat.html

TIP for those using Norton Security, disable the security program for 5 minutes to allow ypu to chat. To do this right click on the security icon and choose Disable then click 5 minutes. Your security program will go off only long enough to get you into the chat room then come back on.

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GrandsPlace Virtual Quilt      Each little square on this quilt represents a little child that is loved and living with grandparents. By adding  the names of children we know that are being raised by grandparents we hope to show the sheer numbers and let each child know he or she is not alone. To add your grandchild's name to our quilt  click below to send an e-mail.
kathy@grandsplace.org

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Great Sites To Visit

For Little Kids	For Big Kids	For Grown up Kids
Crayola Dream-Makers Program encourages creative behavior through art activities. Elmos World Our Favorite muppett from the Sesame Street Workshop.	Bill Nye the Science Guy  Science fans and others will enjoy this link to the PBS television program. Circus Acrobat Clowns Game Help the clowns to collect the balloons. Circus Acrobat clowns Enzo and Gonzo swing each other and jump higher and higher.	Winter Activities for Children Things to keep the kidlets busy this winter season. TheFreeSite.com,  Home of the Web's Best Freebies.

I wish peace to all that read this.

May the things that stand in the way of true happiness be gone from your life. To find true peace and happiness we must first confront our fears. When we aknowlege our fears and embrace them we can then find the path to overcoming the things that stand in the way of true happiness.

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All materials in this web site and newsletters are the exclusive property of GrandsPlace and nothing contained herein may be used without the express permission of the owners. For permission to reprint please contact kathy@grandsplace.org